check

1. Take math exam to enter program at the local college: CHECK
2. Pick up paper work at the school district to submit to college: CHECK
3. Pay registration fee: CHECK
4. Fill out paperwork for the "go to college free" grant: CHECK
5. Sign up for district class to be re-hired as a substitute teacher in the fall: CHECK

1. Worry about taking the course load: CHECK
2. Worry about helping JP get through his second grade year while taking classes myself: CHECK
3. Worry about not bringing in enough money while in school: CHECK
4. Worry about what the future holds for us: CHECK
5. Worry about other "bumps" taking place in our home at the moment: CHECK

At least my lists are equal.  One doesn't out weigh the other.  The only difference is, the first set awards me with a sense of accomplishment and allows me to feel productive.  The second set drains me and leaves me exhausted and gasping for peace.

Hmmm.  Wonder which one I should focus on?  I have a book by Max Lucado called, "Every Day Deserves A Chance."  It is not a very long book.  It is very simple to read.  I have read through it twice.  It's one of those books you really should pick up from time to time and reread all of the markings and highlights you made while reading it the first time around.  It is packed full of positive thoughts and insightful passages.  Just like all of his books.  There is a short passage that I love and I "just happened" to read over it today:

" God knows what you need and where you'll be. Trust Him. Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes..."

 

 

Isn't this true?  God has NEVER failed in this (or any other) area in my life.  Yet when the boat starts rockin' I immediately begin to panic.  In addition to the stresses we have been learning to live with over this past year, Satan has thrown several new logs onto the fire.  AND IT IS GETTING HOT IN OUR HOUSE!  Lately it seems like each time we turn around we trip over another stump in the road. 

And after a while, it hurts.  Our family is getting really tired.  Bruised.

Today was one of those days I didn't even feel like getting out of bed and getting dressed.  I felt a little better as the day progressed, but not entirely.  I just felt heavy, ya know?!  I'm sure that most of you know.  Everyone has their cross to bear.  My dad mentioned today that we may need to reread the book of Job in the Bible.  I might just have to do that. 

Although things seem to get crazier by the day, I am STILL determined NOT to fall victim to self-pity, bitterness and anger.  It's just NOT going to happen!  Despite our circumstances, my list of blessings grows longer each day and I have a brand new appreciation for life. 

This is not at all the direction I intended to go with this post. I hope that everyone has had a wonderful day.  I am super excited about our Wednesday...JP's friend, Joseph (from the previous post), is spending part of the day with us tomorrow!  I will have lots of pictures to share.  Such a special little friendship.

Such a blessing.