I have received many phone calls and comments today. I wanted to thank everyone for always being so kind to me!! I will always be honest in my posts, so I'm not going to tell you that I'm okay. I could not be ANY MORE EXCITED for my dear friends who are exiting PGN all around me, but I would also being lying if I said that it didn't sting a little bit. I mean, what's the difference?? Is is just the luck of the draw??? I mean, how many times do you have to enter/get kicked out and re-enter again?? Are we gonna go for 4?? And while we wait, how many teeth do we have to pull in order to get updates!! My agency doesn't think it's a big deal--- if I hear ONE MORE TIME..."Andrea, technically, you're right on track. It's normal to be in PGN for 6 to 8 weeks." Well, I am the first to admit that I am NOT a mathematician, but we've been in PGN since DECEMBER 15----how does that add up to 6 to 8 weeks?????????????
I am not looking forward to the weekend. My caseworker is off work tomorrow :( AND Monday is Memorial Day--I don't know if she's in the office then either!
Again, it is important for those of you who read this to understand that I am happy for Lou, and everyone else who has had their long awaited prayers answered. It just makes me want to scream out and ask God, "How else can I pray?? What do I have to do to get you to hear me?" I know He hears me, so no one has to write and tell me that He's in control---I know He is! I just am not sure how much more I can handle. My sweet little baby is in an orphanage a million miles away from me! How is that in our best interest?? I haven't held him, smelled him, heard him laugh/cry in 5 months! And at this point I don't know when I will again. PLEASE, GOD! HEAR MY CRY AND BRING THIS TO AN END!!!! I cannot take it anymore!
I thank you all for your prayers and support---I DO need it right now. I am very weak and hurting. I am on my way to bed. If by some miracle I receive an update tomorrow I will post it! Goodnight.
4 comments:
Andrea,
I, again, can so relate to the way you feel and am experiencing the same feelings. I just don't get why or how. I do know that all we can do is trust and ask God to heal our broken hearts in the process. I know this is not any help and may not be what you want to hear (I have been there, too!).
We have never spoken and have only commented back and forth, but you have been on my heart this week. I am praying for you to hear those wonderful words -- that your precious J.P. is coming home.
Love ya,
Amanda
Andrea, I also can relate to those feelings. I don't understand why our case is moving so slowly when the Lord clearly called us to adopt...we are praying for our baby to be home which IS the Lord's will so why is it not being answered? I almost hate those verses about 'whatever you ask in my name will be given to you', 'ask and you will receive', etc. because I feel like I am doing that and continually feel like I am not being heard. Know that I am praying for you and praying that JP is home soon. Please Lord, bring this precious baby boy home soon!
Andrea,
I am praying SO hard that you get the call NOW! We are all praying you out!!!
Andrea
I can tell you're having a really rough time right now. Please know that I continue to pray for you. I am always here for you whether you need a hug, ice cream....about anthing except a punching bag:)
Love ya!
Kerri
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